‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.’
For the most part everyone reading this blog knows that I was once a member of this church. Due to circumstances beyond my control at the time my family and I left the church. For the past 5 years I worked at RWJUH as a unit clerk. I worked the worst shift (my opinion), 3pm -11:30pm. Working the 2nd shift doesn’t leave much room for anything unless you’re up really early starting your day or decide to stay up really late after work. I had no time for myself, let alone a newborn baby. My job wouldn’t work with me on changing my schedule. RWJUH basically told me to deal with it or find another job. Presented with no other options I chose to find another job. I must’ve filled out at least 10-20 applications a DAY and sent out my resume to hundreds of places, LITTERALLY. I was so frustrated. Everyone kept telling me that I was either over experienced or had lack of experience due to the fact that I didn’t finish school (I had to put finishing school on hold for a while due to becoming a new mother).
The day I decided to give up and call it quits (Don’t ask me how I was going to call it quits as a single parent with a newborn), I received an email asking me to please set up a date and time to come in for an interview. As I stated previously, I had given up. I didn’t even bother to respond to the email, I just deleted it and kept on with my day (Stupid I know). A couple days later, I received a phone call from the same exact company that emailed me. I did some research on the company, and came to the decision to brush them off. However, I thought, “What could it hurt by going to the interview”. My confidence had already been depleted because I have heard “No” so many times. One more “No,” couldn’t hurt as much, but before I walked into my interview I asked God to guide me through this interview and if it was meant for me than I would hear back. In less than a week later I was offered the job.
Four months into my position as Parts Manager I was offered a raise and went from hourly to salary. I’m able to take care of my daughter without worrying if I’m going to be the one to tuck her in at night or even worry about whose care she is in because I am grateful that I was able to get her a sitter that I trust 100%. I also have every weekend off, something I didn’t have at RWJUH. I know this was God’s way of guiding me so I can finally stop joking around about being the “Prodigal Daughter” and finally come back home.
Matthew 7:7-8 “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.”
I seriously believe my talk with God is what allowed me to attain my new job. Asking him to guide or steer me in the right direction has placed me in the position. I never prayed before going into my other interviews. I never asked for guidance like I did with my last interview. I just went in with an arrogant attitude like they needed me. I never asked God to Guide me through. I always thought about what I wanted and needed, not what God may have already had in stored for me. There is a reason that my time at RWJUH has ended. That chapter is closed and I’m not going to ask God why he removed me from what I knew for so long. I’m looking at Benner’s as a new chapter, a new fresh start and I’m going to stay there until the Lord tells me otherwise.
When the Lord is guiding you in one direction its for a reason, no matter what part of life its in. There is a reason why God is having you leave that job, or has you not associating with certain people. Don’t fight it. The Lord has the last and final say so. God knows what he is doing. Resisting him is only going to lead you on a path of self-destruction in the long run, trust me. Also don’t be afraid to ask him to take control, well to actually open up your eyes to show you that he’s in control (He’s always in control).
For the year 2013 the goals that I set out to accomplish were to become the best mother to my daughter that I can be, work out my job situation, move into my apartment and to finally go back to school. I accomplished 2 out of the 4, but I believe it’s due to my NEED to be in control. When I decided to finally let go of the wheel I honestly believe that is when I started to accomplish some of my goals. I obtained my job through the Lord and I can finally afford a decent apartment for my little family, which I will be moving (I’m claiming it) into within the next couple of weeks. I know with the Lord’s help I will be able to squeeze my last year of schooling into the equation sometime within the next year.
With that being said, with for the year ahead I’m going to continue to ask God for guidance in every aspect of my life. I want to commit to going to church on a regular basis. I want to get back to that happy time in my life and become closer to God than I ever was before. I know it’s going to take time but I’m willing to make the time. The happiest times in my life were when I was fully committed to the church. I want my daughter to grow up in the church just like I did as a child, so instead of having the need to control everything in my life I am going to step back and ask for help from the Lord and ask for his guidance.
Thank you for taking out the time to actually read my story. I hope you got something out of it as I did writing it.
GUEST BLOGGER FOR DECEMBER 29TH: MARCY